She wasn’t the type to wish away the past, because she thought the past made her exactly who she was. She wasn’t the type who had regrets, who would change things if she could. She wasn’t the type to move on without having learned from the situation.
She was the type to grow from every broken heart, to become a better woman from every ‘what if’. She was the type to build strength from weakness.
But with you, only you – it didn’t make sense. She didn’t learn anything. There wasn’t a reason for the pain or heartache. She’d dated men like you, men who weren’t ready for the type of love she offered. But she truly thought you were different – together, you were both so unique. The only thing that stood out to her was the fact she felt ready and able to finally be herself. To finally have something real with someone who seemed real.
Maybe that was her lesson; not every relationship, or almost relationship, was for a reason. And for the first time, for as long as she could remember, she left without having one. There was no lesson, no ‘ah-ha’ moment. She didn’t walk away having gained strength because there wasn’t anything to strengthen her. She just knew she had to walk away. And she did.
Maybe sometimes things just happen. You don’t learn or grow from them – there’s no lesson from the heartache. Maybe sometimes it is what it is, and it isn’t what it isn’t. Maybe sometimes it just hurts.
- The Dalema