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The Dalema

Finding The Woman I'm Meant To Be

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Exhale

Happy Moonshine

I wish I could bottle up this feeling!!

I’d put it in an old teal mason jar and keep it in my pantry. Then, on days I feel lost or sad, I could take shots of it like moonshine.

I am so incredibly happy to be engaged to my best friend, a man who has never once made me feel insecure. Someone who is everything I never knew I always wanted.

It’s cliche to say but love doesn’t find you when you’re looking. It’s never what you’re looking for. Love comes at a time when you find yourself not wanting it at all – sometimes even when you’re avoiding it. There were no games, no moments where I had to filter who I was or hide my personality.

My love found me when I no longer believed in it. When I thought I was too set in my ways. Love found me in the form of laughter, long conversations ending with “you hang up first” and, even though he will never admit it, we knew from the first date that we were it. This was the real thing.

It’s not always easy but it is worth it!!

I’d go through it all again, only sooner if I knew the broken roads would lead me here. I am so so so so very happy!!

I love someone who loves me back and I get to spend as much time as God intends on this earth with him. For the first time in my entire life, I have no questions. I have no doubts. At this moment I am blissfully happy.

I wish I could put this feeling in an old teal mason jar and put it in my pantry, and on my bad days where I feel lost and sad, I’d take shots of it like moonshine.

Here With Me

I think you were with me
Walking along the beach
You would have loved this place
Always so much to see

A town run by its people
Just like back at home
Mom and pop businesses
Patrons regularly and on the go

I think you were with me
As the waves crashed into the shore
The sun shining through the clouds
I could see your face once more

If heaven was a place
It would be right here in my heart
Though you’re not on this earth
We will never be apart.

  • The Dalema. February 6, 2022.

Daddy’s Girl

My dad is gone

He’s never coming home

He can’t walk me down the aisle

Or sing our favorite song

He can’t dance at my wedding

Or see his first grandchild

He’s not here to tell me stories

Of when he was young and wild

My dad is gone

He’s never coming home

He can’t approve my hand in marriage

Or tell me when I’m wrong

He can’t send flowers to momma

Like each Valentines before

He can’t hold up the phone

And say I love you more

Nothing is the same

Without him in this world

A piece of me is missing

I’m daddy’s little girl

My dad is gone

He’s now up in heaven

We have an angel watching

But we wish we could still have him.

– The Dalema. February 3, 2022.

Worth

No ones supposed to pay for the past

It ended because it wasn’t built to last

You can’t hold grudges, ask for repayment

You built the first floor before the ground pavement

I’ve paid for her sins, I’ve begged for her forgiveness

This was supposed to be forever not built on resentment

I’m not her and she isn’t me

Can’t you see we are meant to be?

But I’ll stand strong, I know my worth

She broke you but I can’t pay for the hurt

I’ve done enough and proved that I’m worthy

I can’t prove anymore it just isn’t in me

Until you see the truth that I’m not her

I’ll lock the door and cry through the hurt

If you walk away I’ll know you were scared

Almost three years and the worth wasn’t there

Who she was it isn’t me

I can’t pay for her sins

This was supposed to be the beginning

It feels like the end.

⁃ The Dalema. 8/27/20

My Heart’s Rhythm

I love you
I’m in love with you
I’m who I am
Because of you

I need you
I’m in need of you
My heart’s rhythm
Is to the beat of you

I trust you
I’m entrusting you
With my future
It’s me and you

I love you
I’m in love with you
I’m who I am
Because of you

⁃ The Dalema. November 5, 2019.