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The Dalema

Finding The Woman I'm Meant To Be

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Reflection

There’s Something Worse Than Heartache

There’s something worse than heartache
She has unfortunately learned
It aches in ways she can’t explain
Staying for years and years

Heartache became manageable
Knowing the cure was her profession
She knew what to do and for how long
Finding love had been her only obsession

But there’s something worse than heartache
Something cutting her deeper than her soul
This deathly and undeniable pain
Is completely unmanageable

It doesn’t just break your heart
It doesn’t only make you feel rejected
It takes over your entire body
You feel like you’re infected

There’s something worse than heartache
It crushes your dreams and makes you a cynic
It turns love into a phantom
And you realize hope doesn’t exist

Love is based on someone else
Someone who doesn’t want what you’re giving
But this takes away your confidence
Makes you question each day you’re living

There’s something worse than heartache
Worse than rejection, loss or resentment
She faced it every day of her life
She was murdered by disappointment.

  • The Dalema. October 8, 2017.
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Raindrop Melody

She closed her eyes
to the sound of the rain
every raindrop in unison
to the sting of the pain
the way it hit the window
with the slightest beating
it reminded her of life
and the history repeating
every drop a reminder
of all that could’ve been
where she went wrong
and where she’d try again
as the thunder didn’t roll
and the lightning didn’t flash
she’d let the raindrops play
like the music of her past
the strumming of the pain
the beating of each drop
the pitter patter of her heart
breath filling silent spots
as she listened along
to the painful melody
she prayed the storm would pass
and she’d sleep for eternity.

  • The Dalema. September 14, 2017.
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Dirty Little Secret

Three steps to a successful, fulfilling life:

  1. Decide what you deserve and realize you deserve it
  2. Be willing to sacrifice what you want in the now to have what you need for the future
  3. Never. Look. Back.

Why settle for mediocre when you deserve something great? You are the biggest hurdle in your own life. Leap ahead, set goals and understand your boundaries – never, ever settle. Life is too incredibly short.

❤️

  • The Dalema. August 22, 2017.
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Less Is More

I need a lot less
in this life than the less
I already have.

But I deserve a lot more
than the more that
I’ve received.

I feel so much more
than I ever really
wanted to.

But here I am praying
I could be the one
to save you.

And of all the things
I have, I’ve lost
or have known.

The one thing
that always remains
is everything goes.

  • The Dalema. June 8, 2017.
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Why I Can’t Wait To Be 30

Here’s to my twenties
Here’s to the old me
Cheers to the end of a decade
Cheers to turning 30

Here’s to those years that broke me
Here’s to the years I found myself
Cheers to the friends who stuck around
And to those who let themselves out

Here’s to the lessons I’ve learned
Here’s to the love I found
Cheers to having happiness
When hope wasn’t around

Here’s to loving my body
Here’s to knowing my worth
Cheers to the mistakes I dated
And for never putting me first

Here’s to all the education
Here’s to student loans
Cheers to old careers
And the cars I used to own

Here’s to my first apartment
Here’s to my first home
Cheers to friends and family
For trusting me on my own

Here’s to societies expectations
Here’s to body image pressure
Cheers to no longer giving a fuck
About the size I measure

Here’s to all the heartbreak
Here’s to all the pain
Cheers to all the blessings
Cheers to the ‘might-have-been’s

Here’s to all the wrong paths
Here’s to all the dead ends
Cheers to finding where I’m meant to be
And knowing how to start again

Here’s to attempting adulthood
Here’s to Friday nights in
Cheers to enjoying the little things
Cheers to understanding who I am

Here’s to the end of an era
Here’s to ending insecurities
Cheers to going with the flow
I’m the best version of me

Cheers to all that’s in the past
The hardest years? They’re long gone!
Here’s to the end of my twenties –
The best is yet to come!

  • The Dalema. April 30, 2017.
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