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The Dalema

Finding The Woman I'm Meant To Be

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Reality

Nothing Else

I don’t want to
Understand
Another soul

I don’t want
Another man’s
Hand to hold

I don’t need
Anything
More than this

I didn’t know
Chemistry before
Your kiss

I don’t want to
Start at
The beginning

I don’t want
To lose us
While we’re winning

I don’t need
Romance and
Butterflies

I didn’t know
True love
Until your eyes

I don’t want to
Be less than
You deserve

I don’t want
Ever after
Fairy tails

I don’t need
Fancy nights or
Jewelry

I didn’t know
We would be
Everything

I want to
Make you happy
Forever

I want this
You and me
Together

I need
Us to last
True and true

I know
What love is
Because of you

⁃ The Dalema. October 31, 2019.

Failure of the Senses

I think

Before I speak

I feel

Before I see

I walk

Before I crawl

I jump

Before I fall

I dream

Before I live

I crash

Before I skid

I burn

Before I warm

I break

Before I’m worn

I think

Before I speak

I feel

Before I see

I jump

Before I leap

But please

Don’t give up on me.

  • The Dalema. May 24, 2019.

You Never Know

I never would have picked you

You never would have picked me

We were both looking for something

Neither one of us could see

I never knew this could happen

You never thought it would again

Being with someone who makes you happy

Everyday spent with your best friend

I never knew I was incomplete

You didn’t know what was missing

Waking up isn’t the same without you

Your lips were made for kissing me

I can’t see my life without you

You don’t say it but you feel the same

I’m going to love you forever

Even after you change my last name.

  • The Dalema. May 20, 2018.

Resentment

My sheets still smell like him

That’s why I lay with you

And every time you bring us up

I don’t want you to

You want me to be the one

To make all your dreams come true

But I don’t even know myself

So how the hell can you?

I was always the one

Wanting ‘meant to be’

I don’t know what I want

And it keeps finding me

They’ve been everything I wanted

Everything I’ve dreamed

Then they tell me I’m the one

And I close down completely

So here you are like him

Falling in love with me

You’re absolutely perfect

Saying all the right things

And here I am again

Pushing love away

I don’t want to let you down

I wish that you could stay

But I’m just not ready

I now fear commitment

And everything I used to want

Is everything I resent.

  • The Dalema. February 12, 2018.

Empty Space

She used to be somebody

She used to be someone

Now in a crowded room

She still feels alone

She used to make money

She used to have fun

Now she keeps finding

Her past can’t be undone

She used to breath for life

She used to smile unforced

Now she feels empty

No way to find what’s lost.

⁃ The Dalema. January 22, 2018.

Balance beam.

Do you want to know what’s really hard?

Life.

Do you want to know what makes it all worth while?

Living.

  • The Dalema. January 2, 2018.

A Letter To You On New Years

To You,

A new year, a clean slate. The first day of the rest of your life. Time for change, resolutions and goals. People are challenging themselves to make this the best year of their lives.

There are a lot of things you could do differently this year. There are new trips to set, new people to meet, new memories to make. There are higher standards you could hold yourself to. You could read more, volunteer more, eat less pizza and drink more water. New year, new you – etc., etc.

With the new year and all the ways you could be different, there are so many things I hope you never change.

There are so many hopes I hope for you this year:

I hope you keep your heart open. In a world filled with cynics and haters, players and cheaters – I hope you keep hoping. I hope you keep loving. I hope you keep believing.

I hope you give yourself credit. With all the insecurities you allow yourself to believe, the defeat you’ve felt and all the heartache you’ve been through, I hope you give yourself credit for being so strong. You should be proud of the things you’ve been through, because you got through them. Stand tallbe proud of yourself. Give yourself credit. 

I hope you love yourself a little more every day. It amazes me the way you love others. The way you put yourself second to those hurting around you. The way helping them heal, helps you heal. If only you would love yourself the way you love those around youyour heart would be full – regardless of how broken and damaged it may seem.

I hope you keep smiling. Your smile is one of your most beautiful and captivating features. Your laugh is infectious. You light up the room. Keep smiling.

I hope you enjoy the moments. Celebrate the path you’re on. Enjoy where you arewith who you’re with. It’s easy to put yourself on a timeline. You do not need to be married because your friends are. You do not need to be single because your friends are. You do not need to have kids, or not have kids, because of what your family says or because your friends have or haven’t had them. You do not need to be or do anything other than the things on your current path. Do not put yourself down because youaren’t where you thought you would be’ at the age you’re at now. Enjoy the moments.

Most of all, I hope you allow yourself the happiness you deserve. You’re so kind and genuine. You always do whatever it takes to make those you love, and everyone around you, happy. You pray for the happiness of others. How about letting yourself be happy? How about you acknowledge you deserve happiness, too? I hope you learn you do deserve to be happy and happiness will find you – you just need to believe in it. 

With all the things you could do different this year, I hope you realize all the things you shouldn’t change.

Don’t forget to love yourself this yearfor who you are and where you’re at in your life, on your own timeline.

Wishing you love and happiness in 2018!

– The Dalema. December 31, 2016. (Republished December 31, 2016)

There’s Something Worse Than Heartache

There’s something worse than heartache
She has unfortunately learned
It aches in ways she can’t explain
Staying for years and years

Heartache became manageable
Knowing the cure was her profession
She knew what to do and for how long
Finding love had been her only obsession

But there’s something worse than heartache
Something cutting her deeper than her soul
This deathly and undeniable pain
Is completely unmanageable

It doesn’t just break your heart
It doesn’t only make you feel rejected
It takes over your entire body
You feel like you’re infected

There’s something worse than heartache
It crushes your dreams and makes you a cynic
It turns love into a phantom
And you realize hope doesn’t exist

Love is based on someone else
Someone who doesn’t want what you’re giving
But this takes away your confidence
Makes you question each day you’re living

There’s something worse than heartache
Worse than rejection, loss or resentment
She faced it every day of her life
She was murdered by disappointment.

  • The Dalema. October 8, 2017.

Faded

As the days passed by
Happiness fading, in and out
Nothing could stay, nothing would –
Unless she loved herself.

  • The Dalema. September 11, 2017.